Archive for the ‘Star Wars’ Category

Darthmas   Leave a comment

star wars darth vader Santa

His reputation is evil. Bent on destruction, the Dark Lord exists to exterminate those who refuse to submit to his will. He’s been known to randomly snuff out lives for simple misunderstandings and disagreements. Obliterate entire worlds through that diabolical intergalactic weapon-megastructure-spaceship known as the Death Start. Not one to mess around, this guy doesn’t take nothing from nobody, no how.

You know who I mean.

Yeah, it’s the Darthster. Good Ol’ Vader.

So why is it that this fearsome foe has taken on such a cute and cuddly image? I mean, look at the above picture. I know I’d love to have this on my front lawn, except it’d probably get stolen. It doesn’t end there, however. I’ve looked around just to see the vast selection of cute and cuddly Christmas gifts one could slip under the tree. After all, Thanksgiving is next week and we all know what that means: SHOPPING.

Here’s a few ways that everyone’s favorite baddie has been humiliated through mass marketing.

Darth-Vader-Candy-Bowl

Who better than to greet our guests with a Darth Vader candy dish? If you think about it, his dark reputation isn’t beyond offering unwelcome visitors with a piece of rejected candy, like all the green Starbursts. He’ll just dare you to take a piece. And hey, if you don’t like it, well, then…complain at your own risk…

Darth Clock

What better way to get out of bed in the morning than being strong-armed by Darth? Here he is, marching towards your mattress, ready to hurl you to the floor if you don’t get up already. His chest bears the time, reminding you that if you’re late for your appointment with doom, there’s far worse consequences for you in store.

Darth Sweaters

Brrr…it’s cold out there in galaxies far, far away. What better way to stylishly keep warm and carry our Dark Lord’s message of cheer? This holiday sweater comes in three fashionable colors, and is suitably tacky enough to be seen at the best of Christmas parties.

darth_vader_and_sonSWVaderdaughterGoodnight Darth

Aww…Daddy Darth…doesn’t he just make you smile? Taking little Luke out for ice cream, or playing tea party with Leia, he does his best to be attentive, except after a busy day with the twins, and then he conks out, like any Daddy would.

Darth Onesis KitDarth Onesies

Darth had to start somewhere, even though at his birth he couldn’t possibly know he’d be reborn as a helmeted hellion. I’m not sure what’s more hilarious – a pacifier or the onesies it goes with. Perhaps Luke and Leia wore the second piece?

darth_vader_large USB

Darth’ll protect your latest novel or business spreadsheet from ever getting lost…that is, until you forget to take this stick drive out of your pocket and slip those trousers in the wash. Then you’ll face the consequences of the Dark Side.

Darth Suitcase

The next time you tool around the universe in the Death Star, be sure to be prepared with this stylish spinner suitcase. There’s plenty of room for your light saber and all other accoutrements of waging intergalactic Empire wars.

Darth Chair

Ah, there’s nothing like being able to relax after a hard day of fighting off your sworn enemies. This chillaxin’ chair offers cushiony comfort for even the toughest of badasses.

Star-Wars-Darth-Vader-Night-Light-Kids-Toy

Who’s gonna mess with your kid when Darth’s on patrol? The eyes seem a little too weird for me, but that ready-to-go light saber tells me he’s at your kid’s side to fight off the ghosties and goblins lurking under the bed.

Darth Ornament

C’mon. You. Want. This.

Star-Wars-Yoda-and-Darth-Vader-Holiday-Gift-Set

I’m sure Darth’d rather be spinning in his grave with deep humiliation if he only knew he’d be paired with Yoda in a Santa suit. Darth won’t go that far, but he awkwardly holds a candy cane just to show he can be a good sport about these things.

So there you have it! Your must-have Darthness for Darthmas – a holiday EVERYONE can love. Enjoy!

May the Holiday Force Be With You   Leave a comment

I’m not going to lie.  This has been an awful year for me.  Annus horribilus.  I’m not sorry to see 2014 go; in fact, I’ll be personally booting it out the door come 11:59:59 on 12/31/14.  I can’t wait.

That doesn’t mean I’m going to go all Bah Humbug during the holidays, however.  In fact, as a result of this terrible year, I’m determined to finish it on a positive note, or even a humorous one.

Sometimes when the self-spirit’s lacking, one has to dig deep to find the certain stuff to pull it up and out.  Get that old smile back on the face.  Muster up some cheer.  To that end, I started with lights.  Dug out the old LED outdoor string and got to work putting them on the gutters for all to see.  Have a few strands of solar lights and stuck them on the bushes on the front lawn, since there’s no outlets there.  Already, the house looked much better.

We did notice a couple of our older strings weren’t working, so Andrew and I went over to Lowe’s and bought replacements.  Hanging in the aisle was this:

Star Wars 6

It’s a Chewbacca stocking.  Andrew walks over to it and says, “I don’t care how much it costs” and throws it into our basket, along with our new color icicle lights.

The next day, I’m in Target, wandering the aisles for a few last-minute gifts and holiday supplies.  I’m looking for Archer Farms Caramel Chocolate Popcorn mix when I happen upon this:

Yoda Lights

I say to myself, “I don’t care how much it costs” and toss it into the basket.  It’s truly horrible, but I don’t care.

We’re the sort of family that gets its tree a few days before Christmas, so that the holiday actually has some kind of special anticipation (as opposed to those who put theirs up right after Thanksgiving, a month before).  I went to the local farmers market.  They always have great trees at good prices.  Of course, they also have all sorts of other things that go along with holiday decorating too, so I saw this:

Star Wars 5

Oh boy.  This was hard.  Oh, these would look soooooooooo fantastic on the lawn, now, wouldn’t they?  A storm trooper with a candy cane?  R2D2 with a Santa cap?  I already had a holiday Yoda, but he looked kinda cute, almost determined to celebrate Christmas with great force.  One look at the price, though, and I wasn’t about to shell out $59.95 when the tree cost half that.  Sensibly, I moved on.

So the other day, my son wanted to go Christmas shopping.  Again, we’re back at Target and he spots these:

Star Wars 2

Oh, heck, they were only $10.00.  On clearance.  Such a bargain!  What better way to drink egg nog?  Of course, the bottom of the glass had the expected caveat:

Star Wars 1

NOT A TOY.  Well, it’s not like we go tossing these things around.  Who’d even think a glass is?

So here we are, putting nice things on tree.  It’s all sparkle and light.

Star Wars 3

Yoda fits in so well with all the other sparkly bits and such.  He’s so serene, stuck in the branches:

Star Wars 7

It’s as if he’s the keeper of the holiday spirit, beckoning joy and light, and be of good cheer.

So I will.

So should you.

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Festive Festivus, Sassy Saturnalia, Kickin’ Kwanza, Happy New Year and all of that, to all of you.

Star Wars Pas de Deux   Leave a comment

Imagine this:  You wanted a big change in your life and, unwittingly, you set out on this epic adventure wherein you witness the death of your mentor, you pick up a woman with danish for hair, you make friends with a giant carpet and a bum on the run.  With no marketable skills, somehow you all manage to wreak major damage to a major investment of a major empire.  Oh yeah, and there’s this big hulking guy after you.  Through pluck and luck, everything works out in the end and you receive official recognition from a whole bunch of people in a very big hall.  For all its majesty, there’s something a bit awkward and uncomfortable about it.  Hmmm…

Then much, much later, after all those demons have been conquered and the next generation actually admits they might be able to learn a thing for two from you, there’s a bit of tarnish and patina on the legend.  Denial plays heavily into what you’re still able to accomplish, but then again, you have luck and pluck, and the once impossible becomes possible again:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/12/07/snl-star-wars_n_6284190.html

Enjoy!

 

 

 

 

 

The Dark Side of Star Wars   Leave a comment

Star_Wars_poster

http://t.co/EKG1mEpIgC

You’re sitting in your favorite chair, reclining and relaxing to that iconic sci-fi morality tale trilogy, Star Wars.  You’re petting the cat, eating popcorn as you watch planets blow up, walkers trip and burn, even the Death Star going ka-blammo!  It’s all good fun, and you even find yourself cheering.

But did you even consider the toll?  I hesitate to say “human” toll…many species lives were lost.  And it’s kind of sad, don’t you think?  But then again, it’s all in the name of a heroic cause, and now, if you click on the above link, you’ll have your opportunity to cheer on the death and destruction, as Digg has tallied all 2,005,645,868 deaths in the original Star Wars trilogy.

Quite a feat, I’m sure, but worthwhile, just in case you wondered…and admit it…you have…

Enjoy!

Starship Spectacular!   Leave a comment

600px-Star_Trek_Warp_Field

From the In Case You Wondered department:

Here’s a complete chart of all the spaceships out there.  Sci-fi ships, that is.

This chart comes courtesy of artist Dirk Loechel and one look at it will tell you it’s a true work of genius and labor of love.  Apparently it’s missing a Tardis, but he explains why at his site.

Enjoy!

 

Be a Star Wars Star!   Leave a comment

Hey, folks!  Just keeping you updated on the latest Star Wars controversy as we wait impatiently for the latest, newest incarnation!

J. J. Abrams, the director of Episode 7, makes an appeal to directly to you, the nerds and the geeks (that includes me, my husband and just about our entire social circle) to donate to UNICEF and if you do, you, yes, YOU might get a chance to win a part in “SW7”!

See here for yourself:

From a press release that accompanied the video:

All Wings Report In! On the set of Star Wars: Episode VII, Director J.J. Abrams was interrupted by an X-Wing pilot and rogue robot as he announced the chance for fans to win an advance private screening of Star Wars: Episode VII. “We are so grateful for the support that the fans from over 119 countries have shown for Force for Change,” said Abrams. “As we close this final week, we’ve added an additional prize that allows the fans the opportunity to see the movie early as a thank you for supporting such a great cause as UNICEF’s innovative, lifesaving work for children.” By contributing at any level by July 25th, participants will be eligible for all prizes including a chance to be in the movie.

Now comes the controversy.  It appears that the vehicle that J. J. Abrams is standing in front of is not really an X-wing fighter.  Even my friend has told me so.  It appears to many to be a Z-95 Headhunter.  Apparently, this is IMPORTANT.

What do you think?  Does the viewing audience/people who claim to be Jedis know their stuff better than J.J?  Or is this a genuine case of mistaken identity?  Remember, we’re looking into the future here.  Could be a whole new class of fighter vehicles!

Watch the clip and decide.

 

 

Official “Star Wars” Leaks   Leave a comment

You knew it had to happen.

With the impending arrival of “Star Wars: Episode Seven”, there’s all kinds of stuff being posted on YouTube.  My husband sent me one link today and after viewing it, I drooled.  If you hadn’t seen this one already, go ahead, take a glimpse:

Note the exquisite detail.  Whoever did this is a dedicated geek worthy of award status.

Of course, if you have that, you’re also going to have to look at the leaked TMZ photos of Episode 7, too.  Since these have been out for a while and no doubt everyone’s had a look already, I’m including these as a matter of convenience.  You know, so you can geek out all in one space.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/07/06/leaked-star-wars-footage_n_5562440.html?utm_hp_ref=email_share#slide=start

Enjoy!

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